Last tuesday... was melissa's 21st birthday...
celebrated at paris ris costa sands chalet.
Gladys and I
Last wed, kylie and i went to zouk again.
This time we managed to get in...
thanks to Gary who helped me queue :p
Met up with Gary and his friends, Sam, May and Kjan.
i was damn mean to kjan... but i just couldn't help it...
who ask him to be so self-centered and heartless last time... serves him right...
it makes me wanna erase that part of my life. totally disgusted.
so don't bother trying to change my hostility towards you... it will never.
dearest kylie
Last Friday... ben picked me up and brought me for dinner...
he made me angry =p ... so when he asked me what i wanted for dinner...
i say anything.... then he started naming japanese, italian... blah~
still angry, i said both also fine. den he say if he bring me to one that has both..
i have to forgive him. That's why we ended at
Pasta de Waruku at Marina Square.
see so easy to pacify me...
(it only takes a bit of effort to make me smile...)
my choya... nice nice :)
jap clear sauce clam pasta
scallop and prawn cheese pizza... loved it!
i bet you've been wondering who's ben...
so here he is...
After dinner, he sent me to work...
work with angel was really fun...
time passed real fast... doesn't make me dread working...
i want to work with you again! love you babe!
after work... we changed back to our clothes in the back seat of jonathan's car...
we were laughing throughout... and took pics...
that explains our messy and wavy hair. quick send me more pics babe!
pretty angel...
after work, went over to pat's place...
edward, julian, edmund, jonathan, paul, zhongyi and jeff were there.
had a bit of bbq food... yummy!
we sat outside... chat about how they got to know me and how we ended up so close.
but couldn't stay for long... cus ben was going to pick me up and go for a chill.
headed to boat quay with ben and cashe.
reached home abt 3am... then we talked in the car till 6am.
oh man... so regret that i went against my mum getting honda jazz :(
realised how romantic the car can be :(((((((((
on sat... ben brought me to east coast...
Waruku Japanese Restaurant for dinner :)
go and tan somemore la! don't listen to me right!
you'll look like bengali beside me.
i can't adjust the brightness... cus i'll look too white (not just fair)...
Waruku Japanese Restuaramt... nice place :)
seafood paper soup...
chawanmushi was damn sweet!
ikura! my all-time favourite!
salmon sashimi
yakinuku don...
after dinner... he sent me to the wake...
attended the wake for about an hour plus...
feel really sorry... cus i don't know how can i make you feel better.
but was glad to see that you and your mum are still staying strong.
stay strong k... call me if you need someone to talk to... promise i'll be there.
after that, ben came back to pick me up
and we went to vivo to meet up with cashe and eileen for movie.
while waiting for the movie, we went over to mono to chill.
caught Get Smart... the show was just alright. not exactly fantastic.
show ended about 2 plus... ben sent me home...
then he drove away and when he was about to reach home...
he decided to drive all the way back from bishan to accompany me. *so touched*
we spend time together in the car till 6am. poor thing...
he had a flight to shanghai at 8.30am and needed to report work by 7.30am.
and he haven't pack his luggage and do his so-called "homework".
hope he wasn't too late and tired for work.
((God never fails me...
he always send someone to pick me up and ease my pain whenever i fall...
for this, i know i'm so blessed.))
*Still, i can't believe you're so heartless towards me...*
I'm stoning at this moment...
I have so many things to write...
but I don't know how to start.
Once I start... tears will just start dripping onto my keyboard.
Last night I made a decision...
but I still don't know whether it's what I really want.
Anyway... I don't think it's about what I want anymore.
Once I said it out of my mouth... that's the end.
Nothing will change. He's has a heart of stone.
What's happiness? And why do we have to come to this end?
I'm in such an extreme state of dilemma.
Initially, I thought I was all prepared for the loss.
I thought about it for one whole night... and know that this isn't the life I want.
I want a guy who loves me wholehearted and if I ever ask him...
"How long do you want to be with me?"...
his answer would be "I want to be with you for the next 50 years."
But I know law's answer would be "As long as we can go."
Simply because he doesn't love me enough.
Maybe it's really time to let go...
No doubt, it does hurt very terribly.
The past 16 months together 说长也不长，说短也不短。
There were much unforgettable memories.
But I do know the wound will heal over time.
I'd be lying if I said it will never... when I know I've been through this a million times.
And I'm really tired of it. I've made mistakes over and over again...
I knew this was a mistake right from the start... but I chose this path myself...
I chose to follow my heart... and love you with all my heart...
that's how LOVE can make us all blind.
It's bleeding within me... so badly.
On a happier note... I know I do have friends who has given me the support I needed.
Gina... Thanks love for being there for me... letting me see a clearer picture. It really did help alot.
Agnes... Those simple words touched my heart. Thanks for letting me know I'm not alone.
Kylie... Thanks dear for lending me a pair of listening ears and consoling me.
Lastly, to Ben who have been there for me unconditionally...
Thanks for making the trip down to make sure I'm alright despite how tired you were. Thanks for keeping me company. Bought me Pocky and friends to cheer me up. Thanks for lending me the "pea" home so that I can sleep well with it. No amount of words can express how grateful I am to have you beside me at this moment. Always calling me to make sure I'm fine and make me laugh (with your lousy jokes). I really appreciate all the effort you've made to make me feel I'm not alone.
the "pea"
Ta da! when you unzip... you see 3 smilee face peas.
Damn cute la! I grasped with joy when I saw them.
How can not anyone smile when you see them?
Some happenings last week...
Last wed, kylie and I decided to meet up after losing touch for these few months...
we planned to hit the club and so we met up at zouk...
kylie reached there at 9pm (ridiculously early right?.. but wait...)...
we arranged to meet up at 9.30pm and I was late. I reached there about 9.50pm.
Kylie starting queuing the phuture queue from 9pm.
And still we didn't manage to get in! wth. They had some ladies quota thing.
And worse of all... we were first in the queue when they hit the quota.
How unlucky can that be. So all the ladies had to join the zouk queue...
and they let all the guys in. That's simply because guys pay to enter!
But I was adamant about not joining the zouk queue because the week before...
I went to zouk and velvet, it totally sucks.
So we decided to head to MOS instead.
But before that we decided to eat the sausage and mash outside zouk before leaving.
lol. we didn't want it to be a wasted trip afterall.
There was no queue at MOS. But the crowd was really bad.
So we gave up after a drink... and left MOS.
Guess where we ended up at?...
At coffee club...
my chocolate delice
kylie's mango ice blended
kylie's baked pasta
my hazelnut coffee
Nonetheless... I really had a good time catching up with her.
At least, at coffee club we were able to have heart-to-heart talk.
Love you babe!
Last thursday...
met up with edward, julian, patrick and zhongyi for dinner and movie.
Had dinner at crystal jade and caught the incredible hulk.
I enjoyed the show, in fact more than sex and the city.
I just loved the love story beneath. So touching.
If only love was this great in reality.
On Friday noon... met with with Sandra and Agnes in town.
Shopped around and had late lunch at Macdonald.
It was a nice catching up with them.
Agnes and I...
Love her to bits!
In the evening, ben came to town to meet me.
we had dinner and shopped around awhile.
After that, he sent me to work.
He bought me plaster and sanitary Pad from taipei...
lol. of course not.
it's some funnie stuff he bought...
goodies to eat.
Erm... I have no idea how am I going to eat them...
but they are really funny.
it's cotton candy... lol.
it's actually chocolate!
Thanks dude!
On saturday night...
joreen came over to my place to chill...
both of us have been so busy with our own stuff...
and we had no time to meet up...
Joreen and I... out from the shower...
with no makeup at all...
It's always so comfortable having her around.
God may have not been fair to me in my love life...
but I know I'm truly blessed with true friends
who stick with me through thick and thin.
Love you girls so much!
I thought I was always strong...
But you made me weak for too long.
I've got nothing left to give.
I'm out of words to say.
I've wasted too many tears.
Unable to dry from all these fears...
You've taken all my emotions inside...
Made me seem like I had died.
